My birthday is this weekend. I choose not to cry.

Having a birthday as a single person sucks. Unless you have a lifelong best friend that you can rely on to throw you a party, you may just have to take the celebration initiative.

Being married is challenging, but the one thing that the other person should feel obligated to celebrate, is your birthday. If your spouse does not make an effort to do anything special for you one this day, that is a pity, and I really feel sorry for you. Please tell me his name, so I can slap some sense into him before your next birthday.

If you are married, or thinking about being married, I will share two things. First is my minimum effort required (average) birthday celebration, followed by my fantasy birthday recipe (if money were no object).


A birthday card – purchased or handmade doesn’t matter. It is the thought that counts.

Dinner – homemade is fine, but I don’t want to have to think about dinner on this day. I think about it almost every other day of the year.

Cake – or something that has a candle in it. I have to blow out a candle to make a birthday wish.

A gift – again, homemade or purchased is fine. I am not picky. You should know me well enough by now to know what I like, but if you have any question, it is ok to ask.

THAT’S IT! – if you did all those things, I would be very happy.

Of course there is still a fantasy birthday. This is not the everyday, #37 or #42, this is the one that I never will forget, but happens just once (maybe twice).

birthday cake


This birthday would start with:

  1. A surprise party: One week before the actual date you will host a party. Sorry, but if you wait until the actual date (May 15th) I will start to get depressed and thinking that you don’t really care.The party will be at a restaurant or other location, but not at home (I don’t want to clean up) Followed by:
  2. A surprise trip: You have planned out all the logistics. You know the places that I have dreamed about traveling too, and made arrangements to go to one of those exotic locations.
  3. New clothes: Since you gave me no notice about our traveling, I didn’t have time to pack a bag. You have arranged for me to have new clothes delivered to our destination.
  4. A bubble bath: When we reach our hotel suite, you will draw me a bubble bath and bring me a glass of champagne and we will relax together in candlelight.

The rest of the vacation, whether sightseeing, or going to the beach, is spent with you. I cannot imagine a person with whom I would rather travel. This is my perfect birthday.

Dear God,

My birthday is this week. I am single for a reason, but I don’t know why that is. Thank you for giving me the strength, courage and clarity to figure that out. Thank you for my friends, that will help me celebrate this year. They mean the world to me. Thank you for sending a man into my someday that will fulfill my birthday fantasy, and that he cares about me with the same intesity every other day of the year too.

Lord, I ask for your special healing on those individuals that feel sad on their birthdays. It is not an easy time, especially when you cannot feel love from anywhere or anyone. Please let them know that You love them. Send someone to reach out and touch them in a positive way, so they don’t feel alone. This is a hard life, but with you, we can endure.

In Jesus name, Amen