In 2009, as my marriage was falling apart, my best friend told me to turn to Proverbs. She said I could read one a day because there was 31, one for each day of the month. I would find answers in the Bible.
I have to say that that advice has never failed me. Tonight, I read Proverbs 31 once again, this time with different eyes. I used to think that the description of a Proverbs Wife was too hard. She holds an impossibly high standard to attain.
First, she is the most hard-working person that I know. Much harder working than I would say I am. In fact, I feel lazy compared to her.
Secondly, she is independently wealthy. She has her own earnings, and she is responsible with money. I am neither. When you don’t have money, it is hard not to spend money when you get it. I have three children and they need things. They need clothes, they want to participate in activities, and I really want live.
This life is difficult, and everything seems to cost money. Spending money sometimes brings short-term pleasure, but the feeling is always fleeting.
So, how can someone with no money be like a Proverbs woman? “She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard” (verse 18), must be nice. I wish I could buy some land. In fact, Lord, if it is your will for me to be a Proverbs wife, please allow me financial success enough to buy land to plant a vineyard.
She extends her hands to the poor. I did that once. There was a man I used to see on the street. Someone told me I should give away $10 per day. It felt good to be able to give. Then, I lost my job. I tried to get a new one. I tried to sell my product, but to no avail. Lord, I pray that you would allow me financial stability enough to give away $10 per day to whomever should ask.
She has a husband who is respected in the city. He praises her. He has full confidence in her. I pray that someday the man I love will become my husband. For now, I wait.
So, is the Proverbs wife an impossibly high standard to live up to? Most will never achieve that height, but does that mean we shouldn’t try? Just as young basketball players look to LeBron James as a role model, we women can look to this woman of the Bible. We may not every become like her, but we can spend the rest of our lives trying.
I know my future husband deserves this type of woman.